New Beginnings

I think it's appropriate that I follow up my last post about the trial and tribulations of living in the East Village with one about new beginnings. Many things have happened over the last four months that have helped remind me that the only thing that's constant is change. I mean seriously.. I'm always moving.. figuratively and apparently, literally.I had a birthday. I suppose 32 puts me squarely "in my 30s" but I'm entirely okay with that. I'm also okay with sharing my age because most people mistaken me for 24, which I can imagine is a hinderance in business situations. I digress.

Recently, I've experienced many fortunate things. But thanks to some very bad luck, I was, and am still am able to fully appreciate how much my life has turned around for the good. At least for now. One of those lovely experiences was a Tribeca film screening of Mistaken for Strangers. On the surface, it was a documentary about the lead singer of The National, Matt Berninger, filmed from the perspective of his brother, Tom. But the brilliant film had so many other layers, about the relationship to ones family, ones self and the creative process. I hope to pass along the inspiration with some take aways from the movie and Q&A session;

• Regarding the creative process, when you reveal the pain and struggle you're going through, that's when the creativity flows. It's funny - so often it seems as if popular musicians or actors just appear out of thin air. Sometimes we learn afterward that they actually struggled for years before hitting it big. We all work hard but how many of us have held side jobs, lived as paupers, and consistently had to keep smiling and performing in the face of rejection? And through all of that, reveal our deepest selves through our performance whereby revealing our vulnerability is actually what helps us connect to our audience. So maybe the key to success is revealing our humanity - revealing that we're all just people going through the same struggles, with the same needs and concerns.

• It takes crafting to tell the truth. For the last few months, I've been in the throws of pitch after pitch at work. I research both the market and consumer. Then eventually, after my brain has been saturated with facts, some sort of story formulates in my head, or is usually scrawled haphazardly on a scrap piece of paper. Then eventually these notes make their way into a PowerPoint. And finally, I go back through the links and PDFs of research to find data points to back up my story. But in the end, it's about finding one truth. Then figuring out how to tell that truth. I am so amazed as to how clearly this process relates to so many other areas of my life. It has helped me in writing my novel. It has helped me figure out myself and how to tell my own story. What is the truth for how I live my life? What dots can I connect from my past, my habits or my behavior that reveal who I am and what truth do I choose to tell? And it has helped me see the world differently. The truth is subjective. It is formed by how you see the world and how you organize facts. So figure out how you want to tell it.

• Don't stop. I can't tell you how many ups and downs I've had over the last few months. Or maybe I should tell you given my above statement. Mostly it's been related to my living situation that is one day away from being completely resolved (hopefully!). The other day I was exploring Bushwick and found myself in a magic shop. Actually, I think they're called Magick shops. Yes, I bought a few inexpensive rocks and a ring in the hopes of ridding negative energy and symbolizing new beginnings. I am entirely aware that this could be complete nonsense but it makes just as much sense as baptism, touching a torah, saying a prayer, wearing a cross.. you get the idea. We look for external forces to help us get through our lives. We view these objects, chants, or rituals as a means to guide us in the right direction. But the truth, that I sometimes don't want to admit, is that no external force is going to save us. It's the way we behave after performing these rituals, whether it makes us more loving, more confident, more at ease or more determined, that helps us get through the hurdles. The only way you can change your situation is by changing yourself. So don't stop and keep going because you'll get through it.

There's No Straight Answer

I'm currently reading Baratunde Thurston's How To Be Black. "But wait," you ask, "why would this very white girl from New Jersey care about issues of black identity?" A few months ago, while meeting with one of the most thoughtful in house agency recruiters, I was asked to explain what interested me about account planning. I told her that I have always been interested in how people's backgrounds and culture shape who they are."That's interesting," she responded. "So Molly, how would you describe yourself on those terms? How has your culture shaped who you are?"

I thought about this for a moment and then realized that despite outward appearances, I'm the product of two very different cultures. When asked what my religion is, I proudly proclaim that I'm a Jewthuran; Jewish and Lutheran. If the person asking is Jewish, it is almost guaranteed that their next question will be, "Who's Jewish, your mother or your father." To which I respond, "My mother, but her parents were practically Atheist while my dad's religion played a more prominent role in my upbringing." Occasionally they'll say in a satisfied, matter of fact tone, "You're Jewish." At which point I'll role my eyes and change the subject because I find the idea that someone else can declare you a particular religion somewhat absurd. I think back to my confirmation classes, bi-annual church visits and fantastically cooked Jewish holiday meals and realize that I still haven't determined which religion I ultimately will choose.

Just as Baratunde grapples with pre-conceived notions of what it means to be black, many of us have aspects of our own identities that fall outside of what is expected. And sometimes the realities of who we are contradicts the perception of who people think we are.

Recently, I decided to wear my hair curly. I usually make some attempt to straighten it because it's more predictable. The choice to let my hair go curly often feels like I'm embracing my Jewish heritage. Which in itself is an interesting discussion. Is Judaism the only religion that is both a religion and ethnicity? As I waited for the train with my abundant curls framing my face, an elderly man came up to me, asking me a question that I couldn't understand because it was presumably in Hebrew. I explained to him that I didn't speak Hebrew because I wasn't Jewish. He looked at me like he knew I was lying, because I was, or at least not telling him the whole truth. Because I am Jewish, at least partially by ethnicity. I'm also Norwegian, French, English ... but like a second generation American immigrant, my apparence allows me to navigate between two world while never feeling a full part of either.

So as planners, when we look at who our consumers are, we must look at them in the context of their culture. Did they grow up in an urban environment, exposed to a myriad of cultures and influences? Are they second generation Chinese whose only indicator of their ethnicity lies with their appearance? Self-made or family money? Private school or public? Artist or doctor? Gay or straight? What information do we need to tell the whole story of who these people are? Because until we get the whole story, we run the risk of speaking to them in a language that they don't understand.

With these questions in mind, what cultural influences have shaped who you are? 

Brands: A Lesson in Western Religion

As I contemplate my next move in the advertising world, I’ve started to delve into the science and philosophies behind positioning a brand. With each client I've worked for, I've wondered, will these ads even matter if at its core, the company does not share these beliefs? A few months ago, I attended PSFK’s conference in NYC and was inspired by their collection of speakers ranging from those passing on philosophical insights to practical advice. Vikram Gandhi’s talk on “Directing “Kumaré From Illusion Comes Truth,” stood out as an eye opening look into why brands have become such an important part of our lives. And well known for being an expert on branding, Debbie Millman’s book Brand Thinking and Other Noble Pursuits compares brands to religions in the first few pages.As an art history minor who spent a semester in Florence, I realize how the history of advertising can neatly be aligned with the history of Christianity. I focus on Christianity only because I am more familiar with its history and symbolism thanks to my art history classes while abroad.

In the beginning of Christianity, Jesus and his story were depicted through symbols. A circle, or halo was used to indicate Jesus along with other elements to indicate important people in his story. Mosaics in North Eastern Italy (Ravenna, Rimini), were featured in churches where people gathered to gain wisdom, a sense of community and direction from these images, each other and spiritual leaders. Compare this to the experience of regularly buying from a store in the 1800s. Would buying from one particular dressmaker or tailor make you seem more educated or put you in the upper class? While you felt that wearing their clothing gave you a particular sense of confidence, the key contact with the "brand" was limited to the physical location it was sold in just as the main connection with Jesus was made in a church.

Eventually, as Christianity grew in Italy, so did the experience of worshipping Jesus. Catholic Churches became more gilded, and church-goers were surrounded by painted imagery that told the story of Jesus. Through rituals and community, Christians were reassured that they were a part of something special and somehow connected to something bigger than themselves. The spread of the word of God inspired countless artwork around its stories but the ownership of the "brand of Christianity" was strictly controlled by the Catholic church.

In parallel, as brands developed in the late 1800s, so did the experiences around them. Their story was told through the in store experience and through newspaper ads. Brands helped people identify who they were and gave them a sense of belonging. Do you drive a Ford or a Mercedes? Do you smoke Camels or Marlboros? The brand images were tightly controlled by the companies that ran them. Brands developed manifestos and content; Soap Operas, The Michelin Guide, etc. but it was not a two way conversation between the brand and the consumer.

Eventually, the Catholic church became the most powerful force in Europe and started abusing its power by charging believers to have their sins forgiven. Like a company that lies to their customers because they know they can get away with it, their brand image eventually suffered. The intersection of Martin Luther's theses' against the Catholic church and invention of the printing press created a huge shift in people's relationships with Christianity. The new group of Protestants were taught that they had a direct relationship with Jesus and could read the Bible for guidance.

Fast forward to the onset of social media in our current century. Like the invention of the printing press in the early 15th Century, social media has enabled an even faster spread of information. Companies who have chosen to take advantage of customers have been exposed and no longer exist. Like Protestants, I can have a direct relationship with the brands I admire through social media. I have a shared set of beliefs with other users of my brands and the brand acts as a virtual church or community where I can connect with people who share my interests. I can go into a Nike store and put on a pair of shoes that I think will make me run faster. Or I can go for a run, motivated by Nike+ in the hopes that I'll run faster and further. Just as I can go to church and take communion or choose to cultivate my own relationship with God at home worshiping various icons and performing certain rituals.

During Easter Services this year, my Pastor, Pastor Derr, known in the religious community for promoting the universality of all religions, said that religions are connected by a universal, human truth. He cautioned against religions that discriminate or against those who skew parts of the Bible for their own personal agenda. He reminded us that we all have the power to learn from our religious leader's teachings and find support through our faith. Clearly this thinking doesn't have to apply to Jesus but rather, to any religion.

So where does this leave brands? Consumers are increasingly expecting the brands they buy to entertain and more importantly, inspire them. I want to know that a brand isn't just out there just to get my money, but exists to make a positive contribution to society, just like I know that my offering to the church will go towards helping the needy. Only then when a brand has entertained or inspired me and given back to society, will I purchase their products in the hopes that the brand will live on to "do good."

I gave money to my church at the service not because I had to, but because I wanted to support the institution and people who had inspired me, who had connected me to others, and who I know will continue to give me spiritual guidance and fulfilling experiences. Because as strong and as resilient as I am, I still need a supportive community and the occasional inspirational push. I don't know if that moment of support will come from a brand or a religious institution but I do know that the person giving it to me will receive my loyalty as a customer.

Weekend Update

A tornado hit my room

My donations to Buffalo Exchange

I'm laying down on a deck in the backyard of a house in Cape Cod. I can get used to this. I haven't had a beach vacation in years. Don't be fooled. Being unemployed or underemployed is in no way, a "vacation." On Thursday, movers came to haul my furniture into storage. The Moishe's Movers were like well-oiled machines - wrapping and carrying out my furniture down flights of stairs in about an hour, and they were on time. The process was much smoother than my first move last year. I even had a few minutes to enjoy my apartment when everything was packed up and my desk was clear - no visual clutter. I've tried to get rid of tons of clothing and books over the last few weeks which have mostly resulted in epic fails - at least in terms of trying to make money from my junk. Buffalo Exchange flat out rejected a pile of clothing that I probably wouldn't have gotten rid of if I had known I'd get no money but I had plans right after stopping by their store.

Made me laugh but left him on the curb

A small casualty of moving. I had just proclaimed in my head how much I liked my Benefit Cheek Stain when I knocked it over.

On Friday, I spent the day running errands and attempting to enjoy the last few hours of my Upper East Side neighborhood. I hung out in Java Girl trying to write my novel, then prepared to drag the rest of my stuff into my father's car by consolidating and packing some more. I spent the final hour of East 66th street laying on my yoga mat in my former roommate's sun-filled room, with a candle lit and a Fast Company magazine, reading, stretching and closing my eyes before my dad arrived.

I had asked about five friends if they could help me move things into my dad's car but most were busy. One said he could, possibly but was uber busy that day. So as usual, I overestimated my strength and underestimated the amount of work moving would take. I was overly optimistic in thinking that my dad could find a parking space (he couldn't) so I didn't call the one available friend. I dragged my huge suitcase down the stairs, ran back up, carried a few boxes to the car and was sweating by my second run. The man who owns the pet store "Litter & Leashes" saw my struggle. He offered to help and wouldn't take no for an answer. So he made about four trips with me up my five flights of stairs - perfectly packed the car when my dad thought all hope of fitting another box was lost, and didn't complain for a second.

He helped me to the end even when I told him I could finish the rest myself. I joked around about how he didn't need to go to the gym for a week and he mentioned that he was fasting for Ramadan. With all the controversy surrounding the Muslim Community center, I thought this fact was particularly timely. How could people equate all Muslims with extremists? The only thing extreme about his behavior was his incredible kindness, exhibited countless times while I lived in that apartment. He treated my cats to free fake mice every time I bought pet supplies. He gave me a sympathetic and genuine hug when he heard that the kitten who fell was mine, and he reminded me how awesome New Yorkers are while I officially moved out of New York City (at least for 2010). It's a nice and (should be obvious) reminder that kindness transcends all faiths.

Romanticizing my apartment. Thanks new Hipstamatic iPhone App.

Java Girl

I Guess I Sort of Love New York Again

I wanted to thank everyone again for their kind words and support. Yesterday was ROUGH but I'm lucky that I live close enough to my family that I was able to spend time with them. Oscar is now resting next to my childhood cats in my parent's backyard. I still miss him and think about him but know it will take time to move on. I'm glad I'm leaving this apartment soon. Thomas is sitting on my lap as I write this, more loving and cuddly than ever. I hope he's okay. Oscar pretty much annoyed the crap out of him for the most part but I'm sure he loved him anyway just like I did.

I'm not religious but the pastor of the church I attend twice a year is extremely interesting, insightful and intelligent so I was thinking of stopping by his office to discuss my thoughts over the last few days. As I was exiting the subway at 53rd and Lex, I ran into him. We talked about Oscar and loss.. and forgiveness. And I asked him if in his experience speaking with people who are going through hardships - if he thought everything happens for a reason. His response was that he doesn't think that's the case but that we can learn from our experiences no matter what. So I guess I've learned that you can never be too careful, that my friends, family and community will be there for me when things go seriously sour and.. I learned what it's like to experience loss and get through it. My pastor said that in his 61 years on this earth, he feels that our current time has been the hardest in history - economically, politically and environmentally and that it's okay to feel down but that we'll get through it. I guess it was upsetting to hear that but I also felt relieved with the knowledge that things have to get better in the world.. and that perhaps I will only experience this time of overall suckiness once in my lifetime.

On a lighter note - updates and re-caps of Internet Week New York to come soon. But I just wanted to get back to my old - funny - lighthearted self for one moment and share the first "I Love NY moment" I've had since I've been back from Colorado. While walking from the F train to the L train at 14th street, two young guys serenaded me with Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel" for a whole block under ground. It was ridiculous and embarrassing but how can I not let a flattering, funny situation like that make my day?